NNI Guidelines
Privacy is imperative! Protect the anonymity of group members by refraining from unauthorized name-dropping. Everything you do and everything you see must remain private. Restrict discussions of the group and disclosure of Meet & Greet time/location to known swingers and people interested in participating in the lifestyle. Meet and Greets are held at a public place the second Saturday Night of each month. Guests interested in joining the group are welcome.This would be the place to bring your non member friends ineligible for membership who are interested in interacting with group members as they are not allowed at our parties. Never disclose Meet & Greet location to those not interested in joining the lifestyle, doing so jeopardizes member privacy. Never leave a tab at the Meet & Greet establishment or the businesses will not want us back!
Website: Only 2 profiles per couple are allowed. Events will be posted on the website. You must check the website for announcements/invitations as we don't send out individual emails for these. If we need to contact you we use the website's private messaging system and/or the email address you provided at orientation. Checking the website for messages and keeping your contact information current is your responsibility.
Message Board Posting: We incorporate an open forum model.Enjoy the freedom of speech, but please THINK before posting...Sex has the potential to be an emotionally charged area; it's a good idea to take a step back and consult with someone not caught up in the emotion of the situation before saying something you might wind up regretting later (hind site is always 20/20). If you have a problem with another member, private communication between the involved parties is a better choice than subjecting other members to the airing of your disagreements through the group message boards. We believe "venting" can be therapeutic, but that personal attacks shed only unflattering light; especially on the attacker. Common sense goes a long way.
Although moderators don't want to step into the position of "playground police"we reserve the right of censorship.
Parties: Most of our parties are held in the homes of members who volunteer to host. Never do anything that could possibly disturb or offend neighbors. Do not block neighborhood driveways; Keep all blinds/curtains shut at all times. Keep noise levels and yourself from being loud or obnoxious. If your outfit is risqué (and yes we love that) please cover up going in and out of parties.
Party house host/hostesses always have the right to access any/all areas of their home at any/all times, have the right to close off/limit access to any/all areas of their home as/when they wish, and deserve our courtesy and appreciation. Anyone who is discourteous to the host/hostess will be asked to leave and could have their membership terminated.
No sexual activity in the bathrooms;this is a necessary facility and needs to be open.
Fighting with your partner or any other person(s) should not be done in public. If you feel uncomfortable, take a time out/go to another room/work it out. If the problem is too large, don't hesitate to leave. Do not have a confrontation at a party. The neighbors may be able to hear and it has the potential for ruining the evening for others, Take it home! Anyone who tries to cause a conflict will be asked to leave and possibly expelled from the group.
We have a revolving door policy on playrooms. With roughly 35 couples at any given party and very limited play areas, private rooms can not be expected, especially if the area has bathroom access. If play area doors are closed it is only to prevent people from standing around in the doorway watching. We do not monitor the play areas and expect all members to be polite and considerate in sharing the play areas.
Be respectful of other's property. Ask before "borrowing". If it's not yours, don't take it; if you break it, fix it/replace it. Pick up after yourself, any mess that you make, you are responsible for! All shopping/preparation, set up/decorating, and before & after cleaning is done by group member volunteers. Taking a turn with set up/clean up and an ongoing effort to pick up after yourselves and others throughout the party will help lighten the load for everyone!
Limit alcohol intake to a controllable level. No one appreciates an obnoxious, not in control, intoxicated person. Being too drunk is not fun for anyone! If you become too drunk you should lie down and rest or leave with your partner. Do not take advantage of anyone that is inebriated. There must always be total consent.
Inform a moderator or the host/hostess of any rule violations; let us take care of the problem. Verbal warnings followed by a second offense gets you escorted to the door;any conduct requiring an apology is grounds for expulsion from the group!
LIFESTYLE TIPS
Swinging is a social sexual activity. The ordinary social customs of meeting people and initiating conversation is not that different than with any other type of social interaction. The process by which acquaintances become close friends is not that different either. As is the case with almost all human social endeavors, if you already know people in the lifestyle you can probably attend your first few events with these people so they can introduce you to others; if you don't, introduce yourself, initiate conversation and watch how others behave. Good opening words are "hello this is our first time here, we noticed you and would like to introduce ourselves to you, our names are ....." Introduce yourselves to both members of the couple, don't wait until one of them heads off to the restroom and then ambush the other one. Don't ignore one or the other; make sure no one feels slighted. Keep in mind that this is a couple's group. If one member of a couple feels they were not treated respectfully, more often than not neither of them will be open to further interaction with you. Establishing the dos and don't s of other couples, respecting the protocol you set up as a couple and communicating them to prospective partners is a good idea. Although not all couples find it necessary to do this, some couples use social "codes" that only the two of them know. Examples might be discreet phrases or gestures which mean:
- One of you is attracted to the people or person he or she is talking to and wants to know if you are interested in swinging with them.
- Areply to the above, either affirmatively or negatively.
- One of you is not having a good time and wants to get away from things for a while.
Sex is the same with swingers as with everyone else. Tastes vary from person to person and from couple to couple. Don't assume that if someone talks or dances with you that they want to have sex with you. Don't assume that just because someone is in the group that they want to have sex with you or welcome aggressive sexual overtures. Appropriate swing etiquette when turning down a sexual proposition is to simply say "no thank you". You do not have to give an explanation because it is unnecessary and often leads to more hurt than just a simple "no thank you". If you proposition someone and they say "no", you should never pressure, coerce, or ask for an explanation. If you are rejected, and it happens to everyone, do not take personal offense or assume the reason for the rejection.
There are many different styles of swinging which you may see in the group. Always show respect for the personal styles, attitudes, beliefs, feelings and hang- ups of other members. Don't be rude or openly judgmental. Many members know each other; this means that if you insult or offend someone, word could spread very quickly to other members, in the same token if you are pleasant and treat people well they will be eager to introduce you to other couples. Just like good friends like to recommend a good movie or restaurant to their friends, most members like to recommend people to their friends.
The key social traits that tend to be appreciated in the swing community are responsibility, friendliness, flirtatiousness, open-mindedness, and most importantly, stability with regard to one's primary relationship.
We are not a dating service. We can not guarantee you "dates" by joining this group.
